Grilled Cheese and Goblins by Nicole Kimberling

Author:Nicole Kimberling [Kimberling, Nicole]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: mystery, supernatural, gay
ISBN: 9781935560562
Publisher: Blind Eye Books
Published: 2018-10-20T04:00:00+00:00

Chapter Four

Even before Keith reached his front door, he could tell Agnes was making dinner. And not just any dinner. She was making a good old-fashioned goblin dinner to help her little Gunther regain his strength. Keith’s eyes began to water preemptively as he imagined the capsaicin-laden steam that would be filling his house.

It wasn’t that Gunther’s mother was a bad cook—indeed, in goblin circles she was considered a model homemaker—it’s just that she wasn’t human and therefore did not cook to human tastes. She didn’t stew meat so much as weaponize it by use of fistfuls of hot peppers.

On the day that Gunther had moved in with Keith, she had taken Keith aside and pressed a small spiral notebook into his hand. Written on the pages were her precious, famous and well-guarded recipes for goblin favorites such as Cracked Hot-Pepper Marrow Bones, Sheep Skull Surprise (the surprise turned out to be extra eyeballs sewn into the sheep’s mouth), and Goblin-Style Pig Trotters, which were traditionally served raw in a bowl of vinegar and garnished with whole bulbs of garlic cut crosswise and seared on the edge of a heated scimitar. On the first page of the notebook she’d made a special note that Gunther, like all goblins, was sensitive to salt and could only abide the smallest amount on special occasions. Then she’d drawn a little, anatomically correct heart.

When she’d handed over the book, Agnes had made him pinky swear to never reveal the secret blends of peppers, and Keith had done so without even crossing the fingers on his other hand. He had been touched by the gift and, after reading it through, dutifully hid it in a locked filing cabinet, where it remained unconsulted to this day.

As he turned the key in the lock of the front door he glanced over to Gunther, whose worn-out expression lifted as he obtrusively sniffed the air.

“Mom’s making knucklebones,” he said with a grin. Then, anticipating Keith’s reaction he added, in a whisper, “Maybe we should order you a pizza?”

Keith shook his head. “I’m sure she’s made me something too.”

As they crossed the threshold into the living room, Keith sneezed. Gunther’s father looked up from his seat on the new sectional couch that Gunther had purchased specifically with his parents in mind.

Like Gunther, Gerald’s body had been reconfigured to appear more human. Gunther had once told Keith that the magician who had chosen his parents’ human appearances had been a big fan of romantic comedies and that was the reason that they closely resembled Gary Cooper and Barbara Stanwyk. Gerald was an older version of the great screen actor now, but not less formal, wearing shirtsleeves and a tie while watching television.

Gerald appeared to be using the television’s screen-within-a-screen function to watch two separate curling tournaments simultaneously. He stood when they entered and embraced his son with an affection that Keith found embarrassingly dorky, yet couldn’t help but be jealous of Gunther for inspiring. Keith’s own father had given up dispensing hugs the second Keith had acquired secondary sex traits, as was the way in his family.

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